Friday 1 December 2017

Mayauru no Okurimonoマヤウルのおくりもの (英译:Mayauru's Gift)

Mayauru the fairy lost her memory and lived alone in the forest.
One day, a girl happened to come by and they became friends.
The girl called lots of friends and they all played happily.

But Mayauru wasn't human and aged slowly.

The children grew up and the time they played all together became lesser, and eventually forgot Mayauru.

And then, the girl she first met...was the only one left.
But that girl grew up and couldn't play with her anymore.
Even so, the grown-up girl refused to forget about Mayauru and came back.

It seems like nothing had changed and she came to visit Mayauru every day.
The grown-up girl became lonely, but she couldn't leave Mayauru behind.

Finally, Mayauru gave the lonely-looking girl a present. . .

Sayonara, words of farewell.

Mayauru was a farewell fairy.
She'd forgotten that because it's painful to have nothing but farewells.

The time the two had spent together was a good, but what if the time they would spend together would become sad? For these sad events, remember those words of farewell.

The girl cried more and tried her best to laugh. 
Mayauru laughed with a bright smile and taught the girl the words of farewell.

Until then, no one knew the words of farewell.
The grown-up girl learned the words from Mayauru.

And that girl who knew words of farewell...

She became the world's happiest/kindest person.



Shall we...part with a smile?


-- From Jap anime "君が望む永遠 Kimi ga Nozomu Eien (The Eternity You Desire)"



虽然没有真正看过这部日本动画,但其中一幕讲述的这篇童话故事,却令我印象深刻,永记在心。

感慨的是,我此刻的心情,就跟那个长不大的Mayauru一样。

感觉上,身边的朋友个个都已经长大、忙于各自的家庭、事业,仿佛忘了曾经跟他们共乐的我。

情绪低落、寂寞、苦闷、难过时,没有一个朋友可倾诉。

老实说,我也不擅于跟他人倾诉,因为总觉得是自己的事,对他人而言,反而是困扰。

等到难得有机会可以对朋友抱怨、不吐不快时,却总被说成是我想太多、庸人自扰、发牢骚而已。结果,很多时候,我只好藏在心里,或是来到Panda Grove这个秘密基地,倾吐心里的不愉快。

有时,当我想尝试主动联络、发个简讯,关心一下,换来的却是音讯全无。

这段时间,我也发觉:电台新闻室一些同事对我冷淡、态度不如以前般亲切。打个招呼也是爱理不理的,热脸贴冷屁股。最近也有好几次,我独自一人吃午餐。虽然比较自由自在,但心里面还是觉得怪怪的。

是我这个朋友平时对他们还不够好?还是哪里做错了、做得不好,惹到他们?

结果,我都是在责怪自己。

原来友情这种东西真的会随时间而改变、磨灭、消失。

小时候一起玩的同学,长大后,因为经历不同的人生历练,而不再单纯。

再好玩、再疯狂的哥们/姐妹淘,等到当人夫/人妻、成为人父/人母后,就不再跟你嬉笑胡闹。

曾经共同努力打拼、共患难的同事,到最后也只是同事,不是朋友。

而现在唯一会在我难过时,陪伴我、让我抱一抱、听我诉苦的“朋友”,就是自己从小就在一起的玩具熊。

有点讽刺,但却是最真实的现况。

水瓶座的我,总是把友情看得很重,对待朋友甚至好过家人。所以,现在连一个知心朋友也没有的我,是不是应该坦然面对真相?你不把我当朋友,那我也无需真心以对?

我知道很难,因为如果朋友又对我好,我还是会对他们好,不至于翻脸绝交。

不过,现在的我会筑起一道隔离墙,好好保护自己不再受伤害。我要时时提醒自己:要对自己好,多过于对朋友好。

因为这世界真的没有万岁的友谊......